Most people think sex is awesome. I think most people would agree that the idea of sex is awesome, and that awesome sex is awesome…sometimes, however, the reality doesn’t quite live up to the hype. Sometimes you need a night where the sex is extra mind-blowing. How can we enhance our sex lives? Cannabis offers us some great options! Whether the day is stressful and you’re wound tighter than a drum, or you’re just looking to put the spark back into a wonderful, long-term relationship, cannabis can help.
One of most common misconceptions about sex is that the only erogenous zones lay below the belt. In reality, the main event is between your ears. Even down-and-dirty, one-night-stand sex begins with the idea that it’s exciting and sexy—all of which are notions that reside, you guessed it, in your mind. Cannabis is known for influencing our minds and perspectives, and is similarly helpful in kick-starting some of the more physical aspects of sex, such as getting an erection or relaxing the vaginal walls.
So, how can you introduce cannabis into your sex life?
Step 1: Set the mood.
Cannabis is a wonderful sexual enhancer. It cannot, however, do all the work. You’re gonna have to keep doing all those wonderful little things that turn you and your partner on, whether that’s cooking a wonderful meal, drawing a bath, or pulling out that box from under the bed with the handcuffs and cat-o-nine-tails.
There are so many ways to use Cannabis now, and it can be a bit daunting. You can smoke, vaporize, eat, rub, spray, or even place a dose under your tongue! Cannabis does behave a bit differently depending on how it’s used, however, so here are a few pointers. First, I don’t recommend smoking. Hey, I’m a physician, I don’t want you to have great sex and then die of lung cancer! It’s true that most data suggest that cannabis smoke won’t cause lung cancer, but that data is not yet conclusive, so why risk it? Vaporization avoids the whole smoking aspect, while providing ease of use and rapid onset.
Edibles and tinctures have wonderful properties for general cannabis use, but they can take so long to kick in that I don’t see them as ideal for sexual experimentation. Products like cannabis lubes and sprays are getting a lot of attention, and for good reason. They can definitely heighten the sensitivity of certain bits and bobs, so they’re worth checking out. Remember, though, they won’t affect anything except the area of application, so they won’t alter your mental state—where the major action is. Also note that they take 20-40 minutes to kick in, and you’ll have to plan accordingly.
Bottom line: I think vaporized cannabis is the fastest, sexiest, most reliable ingestion method to get you and your partner in the mood. Set your vape to 356° F (the magic number) and share it with your partner.
Step 2: Set the stage.
Unless discomfort is part of the play, an intimate setting and a comfortable, safe environment are key for good sex. Sometimes this means the bedroom, other times it might mean the kitchen table or the stairs, but no matter what, be sure it feels right. Cannabis helps us be “in the moment,” relax and enjoy the action. Poor attention to the setting will undermine the benefits of cannabis. You can “shotgun” with your vaporizer. Take a puff and hold it, then give your partner a very sexy kiss. Gently exhale into their mouth while they inhale the smoke you give them.
Step 3: Focus.
This is a major area where cannabis can help. Cannabis helps us shut out the world, leave the day behind, move past the anxiety of performance or past injuries. Having set the mood and stage, now is the time to concentrate on your partner. Use the heightened sensitivity to touch that cannabis brings to extend foreplay, and touch areas that are not usually erogenous zones.
Most men will find that cannabis allows them to get harder and last longer. Orgasm is usually much more intense. But for men, dosage is key. A little goes a long way, and too much is, well, too much. I often say, “It’s hard to do the deed if your head is orbiting Jupiter.” Women generally find that dose is not as important. While you can certainly consume too much cannabis and feel uncomfortable, it’s usually doesn’t impede sexual activity.
Step 4: Be mindful.
Perhaps this should go without saying, but we should be aware of our partners’ needs and desires. This includes likes and dislikes among sexual activities, as well as having positive consent. It also means that after all is said and done, sex isn’t “over.” Subtle touch and cuddling are major contributors to the beneficial aspects of sexual communion. Cannabis will amplify these connections, both in your mind and body, so take the time to engage after orgasm.
Now you know how to get started. Set the mood, set the stage, focus and be mindful. If you have more questions, I do couples and individual sexuality counseling with cannabis. For more information, visit our website: www.inhaleMD.com.